Drugs, Dreams and Consciousness

Thoughts beyond the noise

My life has been devoted to those intense sensual experiences, whether through drugs or sex, and what those experiences have meant to my consciousness. That is not to say, that I have merely been  a junky for these cosmic touches upon my soul or person, I have in fact spent more time trying to understand their meaning than I have just enjoying them. The deeper experiences often cause more long term angst than a mere brush with pleasure ought to and life can be emptier than before, once the divine moment has moved on.

Ecstasy, the feeling, not the branded drug MDMA, has, like the path of a bush fire, a way of making its  impression upon you permanent – a scar of joy, which cauterises the numb tissue of everyday life, that may have preceded it.  The sudden immersion in ecstatic love, which seemingly can come from nowhere, is as disruptive an experience as any other in our lives, but we hunger for it. For an often brief period, we are buoyed by a shared taste of extreme spiritual and physical pleasure. Even the topsy turvy pains of romantic love are appreciated by the participants.

This kind of love, like the highs of a drug experience, invariably do not endure and in accord with the Newtonian laws - what has risen must fall. Gravity is such a bummer. Gravit-arse. Some people in my life have been ready to judge, and condemn, my relationship with the ecstatic nature of these agents as mere by-products of addiction. I would say that addiction is the natural state of most animals and that we as humans are no more than brainy monkeys. Accept the addictive nature of ourselves and manage what we are addicted to – love, peak experiences, what the postman brings…