Effy Macy’s Mercurial Almanac: Not Mercurial, and Not Really an Almanac

Effy Macy is a seer, a hearer, but not much of a looker. Her astrological predictions are famed for their accuracy. Simply pick one at random; it'll work just as well as traditional astrology. Meanwhile, her advice on a variety of modern dilemmas can only be described as advice, while her adages defy all description, and are pretty good stuff. 

In fact, everything she writes is so incredibly useful that we have abandoned the tired old almanac format, instead using a spritely new format which is similar to a random list of unrelated things, but arranged according to the days of the year, like an almanac. Bear in mind, however, that the dates are as irrelevant as almost everything else in the book. We say 'almost' because the copyright is not irrelevant; mess with that and we'll punch you in the freakin' throat 'til you cry. 

LEGAL DISCLAIMER: This is not a serious guide, and the advice on these pages should be understood as nothing more than that, without the legal condition of such in a court of law and not pursuant or otherwise to any actionable action vis giving, receiving, disseminating, reaping or otherwise handing out and/or taking back of advice or other things. Advice is taken (and given) at someone else's risk, not ours, and if you take the advice herein it is understood that you do so as if giving it to yourself, in the spirit of it not being us that has made you do it, and whatever harm comes to you, it is no fault of anyone but yourself and/or the others, these not being us. It was nothing to do with us.