How To Embalm Your Little Sister And Other Useful Skills

Science Fiction & Fantasy, Fantasy, Contemporary
Cover of the book How To Embalm Your Little Sister And Other Useful Skills by Darius The Dark, BookBaby
View on Amazon View on AbeBooks View on Kobo View on B.Depository View on eBay View on Walmart
Author: Darius The Dark ISBN: 9781620955420
Publisher: BookBaby Publication: March 17, 2012
Imprint: Language: English
Author: Darius The Dark
ISBN: 9781620955420
Publisher: BookBaby
Publication: March 17, 2012
Imprint:
Language: English
Do not read this book. The world is full of lovely books to fill readers with joy. You can befriend cute characters and sing cheerful songs. You can choose to be transported to magic meadows with rainbow-colored, talking unicorns. You can enroll yourself in mythical schools of marvelous magic. You can conquer a school bully, fall in love, solve a crime, or walk with a hero from history. Reading a book can be a delightful experience. There is nothing pleasant in this book. No one enjoys the company of lawyers. You will find it uncomfortable to sleep on cold rocks. It is exhausting to walk for miles through harsh terrain. Concealing dead bodies is a grisly task. You will not enjoy the disagreeable creatures within these pages. Not only will they attempt to kill you, but they do not practice good personal hygiene. Blood, mucus, eyeballs, teeth and burnt flesh should be excluded when books are written. Sadly, they will be spattered on you, should you choose to read this book. Your throat will be sore after repeatedly screaming, “Don’t go in there!” Your eyes will grow tired as you read about endless hordes of undead. You will be suspicious of bread and fearful of puddles. You should avoid this book and then your throat, eyes and appreciation for baked goods will remain intact. This book will introduce you to: • A tall boy who wears a musty coat with way too many pockets. • A girl who always wins at hide-and-seek. • A small girl who is uncommonly fond of stabbing. • A colorful girl who says way too many long words. • A pile of sand with an annoying personality. You will learn important skills like: • How to deal with tentacles when your sibling is drowning. • How to care for injuries such as cuts, bruises, broken ribs, paralyzing poison and gangrene caused by the undead. • How to find water when dying of thirst. • How To Embalm Your Little Sister And Other Useful Skills.
View on Amazon View on AbeBooks View on Kobo View on B.Depository View on eBay View on Walmart
Do not read this book. The world is full of lovely books to fill readers with joy. You can befriend cute characters and sing cheerful songs. You can choose to be transported to magic meadows with rainbow-colored, talking unicorns. You can enroll yourself in mythical schools of marvelous magic. You can conquer a school bully, fall in love, solve a crime, or walk with a hero from history. Reading a book can be a delightful experience. There is nothing pleasant in this book. No one enjoys the company of lawyers. You will find it uncomfortable to sleep on cold rocks. It is exhausting to walk for miles through harsh terrain. Concealing dead bodies is a grisly task. You will not enjoy the disagreeable creatures within these pages. Not only will they attempt to kill you, but they do not practice good personal hygiene. Blood, mucus, eyeballs, teeth and burnt flesh should be excluded when books are written. Sadly, they will be spattered on you, should you choose to read this book. Your throat will be sore after repeatedly screaming, “Don’t go in there!” Your eyes will grow tired as you read about endless hordes of undead. You will be suspicious of bread and fearful of puddles. You should avoid this book and then your throat, eyes and appreciation for baked goods will remain intact. This book will introduce you to: • A tall boy who wears a musty coat with way too many pockets. • A girl who always wins at hide-and-seek. • A small girl who is uncommonly fond of stabbing. • A colorful girl who says way too many long words. • A pile of sand with an annoying personality. You will learn important skills like: • How to deal with tentacles when your sibling is drowning. • How to care for injuries such as cuts, bruises, broken ribs, paralyzing poison and gangrene caused by the undead. • How to find water when dying of thirst. • How To Embalm Your Little Sister And Other Useful Skills.

More books from BookBaby

Cover of the book Conversations With God by Darius The Dark
Cover of the book Janus: Private Eyes by Darius The Dark
Cover of the book And They Thought It Only Science Fiction by Darius The Dark
Cover of the book Two Fledglings by Darius The Dark
Cover of the book The Ex-Factor by Darius The Dark
Cover of the book Aesop's Fables with Colin Hay by Darius The Dark
Cover of the book Someone Waiting for You by Darius The Dark
Cover of the book Philippians by Darius The Dark
Cover of the book 21 Days Declutter Your Life Journaling Challenge by Darius The Dark
Cover of the book Lemmi Spinoziani by Darius The Dark
Cover of the book Return to the Wild Frontier by Darius The Dark
Cover of the book A Quality Life by Darius The Dark
Cover of the book Bi by Darius The Dark
Cover of the book The Turquoise Wave by Darius The Dark
Cover of the book Physician Heal Thyself by Darius The Dark
We use our own "cookies" and third party cookies to improve services and to see statistical information. By using this website, you agree to our Privacy Policy