Living for Damn Near Ever with the #%@&*! Dog

My wife wanted a dog. I was certain that I never wanted one. When our daughters came along, she insisted that a dog would fill out our family happily. I knew better, but lost the argument.
This is the story of everything I did to delay their acquiring a dog and what happened when they finally succeeded against my wishes. It recounts many of the odd happenings that accompanied our divergent views on dog ownership, especially as the animal in question managed to live far longer than dogs are supposed to.
A first person account, the characters are Wife, Daughter #1, Daughter #2 and dog with minor appearances of a neighbor, his son, a couple of dog care helpers and the vet.
Written as a humorous story, it is suitable for anyone who has been exasperated by pet ownership and for those who really don't like dogs. The devoted dog lover should read something else.