The Unauthorized Bible Cookbook: God's Secret Delights

For Heaven’s Sake … Let’s Get Cookin’! Get off the couch, out of your man-cave and set up your backyard BBQ! The Unauthorized Bible Cookbook takes you back to the days when men really knew how to cook and eat. Bible cooking is a manly art...plenty of meat, blood and bones, and portions that serve thousands. Is this cookbook irreverent? Yes. Funny? Yes. Authentic? ....Well some recipes are interpretations, but most are God's exact recipes Word for Word. Bible stories are full of manly men doing manly things. Think about David, and Samson, and Jonah...they weren't afraid to kick some butt. And they didn't back down when it came to cooking: Snake Tenders, Solomon's Block Party Feast, and Aaron's Old Fashioned Bar-B-Que are just a few of the recipes found in this exciting, but unauthorized tale of Biblical killing, cooking and dining.

Though some of the Bible recipes have fallen into disuse due to contemporary tastes (not to mention changes in social conventions, legal constraints, at-home butchering complications and so on), the Bible Cookbook offers a broad-ranging culinary feast of unique taste delights, extraordinary cooking challenges and adventurous dining experiences – all based on actual Bible descriptions (some exactly as depicted, some loosely interpreted). Beware, some of the dishes and preparation rituals may not be for the faint of heart, but the special connection to Judeo-Christian tradition will stir your imagination and delight your palate, enriching your diet while enhancing your soul. Within these pages, the actual literal Biblically-prescribed recipes and preparation hints are presented – often as given by the Word of God Himself!

Caution: many of the dishes call for generous portions of meat products – but we see no harm in selecting similar soy and vegetable-based substitutes: “Mock Ox”, “I Can’t Believe it’s Not Goat”, “Lamb-Sham”, and numerous other alternatives to meat products may be available at your local specialty store. Similarly, many homes are ill-equipped for large scale butchering of live animals, especially in the quantities that some of the recipes call for, so fun and interesting substitutions are offered where possible.

Though the authentic Bible-based dishes are literally translated to today’s culinary sensibilities, we’ve embellished here and there with special touches and serving suggestions that in no way disrespect the intended “bread and circus” effects the originals called for. We’ve taken some license in updating the preparation details where they haven’t been fully provided in detail in the Bible-Inspired recipes – so don’t be dismayed if you cannot find the specific preparation details in the actual Bible because they are not there. Note that not all dishes have been prepared in our test kitchens in some of the quantities specified in the Bible … so exercise caution with some of the more ambitious feast requirements. By the same token, customs were slightly different during Biblical times so in ALL CASES, check with your local law enforcement officials, health department and, to be especially safe, an attorney familiar with live sacrifices and outdoor burning laws. Some communities will require special Permits for some of these dishes – some will ban them altogether! Caveat emptor!